Phone call with Beth

I just got off the phone with my sister from North Carolina. She's moving to Washington with her son in a couple of weeks. My parents and two little brothers live there. She was telling me about how they sounded on the phone, all grown up. I'm not sure how long it's been since she's seen my parents and brothers. But it's been since 97 for me. I did see my mom for a short while at my grandfathers funeral in North Carolina I think in 99. And that was it. I haven't seen or heard from them since. Well, scratch that, my dad called me late last year to ask me for money. He got my number from my ex-sister-in-law.

Anyways, my sister was telling me about how my little brother is 17 now!! First, that sort of blew me away, for some reason I was thinking maybe he was 15. Lol. And she told me that he had his license and was liking some girl and had a job. My mom told my sister that Michael is hardly ever home anymore. I'm totally in disbelief right now. Yes, I knew he had grown up.......but damn. When I left, he was still playing with legos and hamsters and fighting with my littlest brother.

I just can't believe I've missed this much. Trust me, it's not my choice to be missing out on all of that. I mean, I didn't even know where my parents were living these days until my sister told me a month or so ago. I thought I was used to not hearing from my family. But when I hear stuff like how grown up my brothers are now.....it's depressing.

It's like when I was young, my two oldest brothers moved out, way out, across the country and so I grew up not really knowing them. And I hated it. But now, it's happening with me and my younger brothers. It's just a weird feeling that was kept well suppressed until today.

But whatever.